Kairos Counseling Therapy for Individuals, Couples, & Families

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  • Anne W. Lee, M.A., L.M.F.T.
  • Shirley A. Miller, M.S., L.M.F.T.
  • Teri K. Reisser, M.S., L.M.F.T.
  • Sandra Gay Sanders, M.S., L.M.F.T.
  • Debra Warner, M.S., Marriage & Family Therapist Registered Intern 67155
  • Michelle Wortner, M.S., Marriage & Family Therapist Registered Intern 62015
ONE STEP CLOSER To a Brighter Tomorrow
Kairos (ky-ros) is a Greek word meaning an opportunity in time for something important to happen.

Welcome!  It is important you're here!

In theology kairos is a God-given opening in time, laden with meaning and choice, a special moment of grace, truth and decision...a time for change, renewal and decisive action.  Aristotle spoke of kairos as a time in which the proof or truth is delivered to impact the psychological and emotional makeup of those listening.

Kairos Counseling Center
890 Hampshire Road
Suite W
Westlake Village, California  91361

For General Information you can contact us at info@kairoscc.com.


Sandra Gay Sanders, M.S., L.M.F.T.
 
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

(805) 551-1611
sandra@kairoscc.com


Sandy has been in practice for over twenty years and licensed since 1990. She and has specilaties in trauma, both in childhood and present, women's issues, depression, anxiety and relational problems.  She uses various methods in counseling sessions--from psychodynamic, object relations, cognitive behavioral and is certified in EMDR, Grief Counseling and has had several years intense training in Dissociative Disorders and trauma.  Because of her knowledge of all the variations of trauma, Sandy has been a recurrent guest speaker on national radio programs and is frequently asked to teach within the mental health community and speak to various groups both in and out of our community.  She has been named "Woman of the Year"  because of her work with the disabled, and continues to bring great passion to both her practice, God and her family.  Although her patients are of many faiths, Sandy easily integrates the current psychotherapies with Christianity. She and Teri Reisser are the clinical senior staff members of Kairos Counseling Center. Happily married to her college sweetheart, Clarence, since 1964, they are the parents of an adult daughter, Laura.  She feels her most enchanting "job" is being "Tata" to her grandchildren, Benjamin and Sarah.

EDUCATION
B.S.from University of Memphis, with a major in sociology and a minor in education
M.S. from California Lutheran University wuth emphasis on Marriage and Family Therapy
Level II Certification in EMDR
Level II Certification in Grief and Loss Therapy
Hypnosis Certification
Membership in CAMFT
Advanced training in Dissociative Identity Disorder and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder 



Please feel free to leave a message on this site or sandra@kairoscc.com.  If you wish to make an appointment, please download the application forms and bring them to our first appointment.



SCROLL DOWN TO SEE A VARIETY OF PAPER ON VARIOUS SUBJECTS: 




BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER

 

WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS?

 

Features of Borderline Personality Disorder include:  aggressive behavior, difficulty controlling emotions and impulses, problems with unstable and intense relationships, a low sense of self worth, and frantic anxiety about being abandoned.  Unlike similar experiences that everyone experiences once in a while, the negative or destructive behaviors of BPD are intense and occur reportedly over a long period of time. Other characteristics of BPD may include long term feelings of emptiness, frequent and sometimes violent temper tantrums, self injury (such as cutting or burning yourself), and suicidal behavior.

 

WHAT CAUSES BPD?

 

The cause of Borderline Personality Disorder is not completely understood, but the disorder seems to run in families.  Often people who develop this disorder had childhood trauma or early loss or separation from a parent.  It is also common for people who get BPD to have certain personality traits such as problems coping with anxiety or stress.

 

An imbalance of chemicals in the brain called neurotransmitters may also play a role in  Borderline Personality Disorder.

 

WHO IS AFFECTED BY BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER?

 

Borderline Personality Disorder affect approximately 2% of the population.  About 75% of those diagnosed with BPD are females.

 

If you have a parent or sibling with BPD, you are at risk for developing the condition.  It is also more common in families where members have other conditions such as Antisocial Personality Disorder, Substance Abuse or other mood disorders such as Depression.

 

HOW IS IT TREATED?

 

 

Although there is no “cure” for BPD, symptoms can be successfully managed with professional counseling and medicines such as antidepressants or mood stabilizers.  Treatment can be challenging, however, and recovery may take a long time.  Although relationships with health professionals such as therapists can be stormy, long term counseling is often an important part of treatment.  Other conditions that commonly occur with BPD, such as Depression or Bullimia Nervosa, can make treatment even more complicated.







Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

  Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and How It Happens

  P.T.S.D. is a reaction to an overwhelmingly traumatic event that is beyond the range of normal human experience that threatens a person’s sense of self, safety or security.  The list of overwhelming experiences include: war experiences, victims of rape or abuse, childhood physical abuse, hurricanes, tornadoes, earthquakes and auto crashes.  The symptoms of P.T.S.D. rarely become apparent during the horrific event. Although symptoms can appear soon after the event, they can also appear weeks, months or even years after the traumatic event occurred. After trauma, never assume the survivors are O.K.  The P.T.S.D. diagnosis can be chronic, acute and/or complex.

Traumatic events involve varying degrees of loss.  Depending on a number of variables, the survivors could experience:

►Loss of safety or security  After trauma the individual may feel unsafe or afraid to be alone at home, the workplace or school.  Places that once represented safety may seem lost or violated.

►Loss of relationship  Even if there is no loss of life, the trauma may be enough to end a relationship.  (e.g. A man may choose to end an engagement after his fiancé’ is sexually assaulted or a child who runs away from his family after the family home burns down.)  If a death occurs, there is also a loss of the relationship with the person who dies.

►Loss of self esteem  During trauma, the victim will usually feel powerless or helpless.  They may hold themselves responsible for not stopping or fixing the event.

►Loss of Identity  Following a natural disaster, a personal trauma such as incest, rape or the loss of a career, the survivor may lose his/her sense of self.  Familiar roles may be altered in the workplace or home.  Reactions and behaviors may be unexpected, creating confusion and doubt within the survivor.  Some individuals may question their behavior and wonder why they feel as they do.

  Symptoms and signs

  The emotional reactions to P.T.S.D. are prevalent and predictable enough that when they are identified in a patient, the person is said to be suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.  P.T.S.D. can occur at any age, including childhood.  Some of the symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder are:

►Nightmares and other sleep disturbances                ►Hypervigilance

►Difficulty concentrating                                              ►Increased stress in personal relationships

►Emotional instability                                                   ► Startling very easily

►Memory loss

  Vivid memories of the event can sometimes bring on painful memories and overwhelming emotions.  The memory can be so strong that the person may feel that he/she are reliving the event.  This is called a flashback.  Children will often relive the experience through action or repetitive play.

  Most survivors of traumatic events eventually recover and their symptoms gradually diminish and disappear.  However, certain situations, smells, or sounds may trigger an unwanted memory of the traumatic event.  When the symptoms interfere with a person’s daily life, this is calledPost Traumatic Stress Disorder or P.T.S.D.

What is PT.S.D.?

Chronic symptoms of P.T.S.D. can be so debilitating that they interfere with a person’s ability to function socially, at work or within the family. P.T.S.D. may be difficult to detect because the victim may have memory loss of the traumatic event or may have been emotionally detached from the pain of the event.  The survivor may remember the event, but have no memory of how it felt at the time.  The emotional memory may surface without the memory of the event.  When that happens, the patient may feel “crazy.”

Those suffering from P.T.S.D. experience intense feeling of fear and severe flashbacks.  This intense fear may lead to Panic Attacks, during which the heart races, the throat tightens or the person may become physically ill.  During a panic attack, the person relives the unresolved, intense fear of the traumatic event.  When a severe flashback occurs, the person may act as if he/she is actually experiencing that event again, yet may not be fully aware of what he/she is doing.

An individual with P.T.S.D. may also experience nightmares that are so intense and full of terror that the individual may develop sleep disorders such as insomnia to avoid them.  Children may have repeated dreams of monsters or trying to rescue others. 

Survivors of P.T.S.D. also suffer emotionally, sometimes in the form of sudden, intense, repeated and unexplained bouts of anger or grief.  This emotional suffering may take the form of emotional numbness or avoidance, or the person may alternate between  intense anger, irritability and sadness.  This may lead to the person’s not being able to express any emotions at all.  Of course, this may lead family members and other loved ones to feel that the person suffering from P.T.S.D. does not care for them at all or is indifferent to their concerns.

P.T.S.D. sufferers will also avoid things or situations that bring up memories of the traumatic event.  If untreated, the person’s daily life may be gradually be dominated by trying to avoid situations that remind the person of the event. If other people died or suffered during the traumatic event, the individual may suffer from extreme guilt for having survived when others did not.

All of these powerful and unresolved emotional and physical stresses combine to bring the P.T.S.D. sufferer to a state of depression.  The person is stuck in the “fight or flight” brain chemistry.  In an attempt to dull the pain and soften the attacks of anxiety, panic and loneliness, the P.T.S.D. sufferer may turn to alcohol or drugs.

There is much that can be done to help patients with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder to help them process the trauma.  Look for upcoming editions of White Paper to discuss treatment and how you can help loved ones who have this extremely painful disorder.

 For further information or assistance, please feel free to contact me.
                                                 


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